I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything seems to be going wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day and I believe in miracles~Audrey Hepburn

Friday, November 6, 2009

Te Iu Besc Grandma, I miss you.


Te Iu Besc. Romanian for I love you. This is for a woman I admired, looked up to and loved to the fullest. This was my Grandma. A beautiful and feisty Romanian lady who despite having so many struggles and heartache in her life, she never gave up. Never stopped loving her family or giving everything she had to us all. It's on this Friday that I think of her, remember her and all that she meant to me. She is never far from my thoughts and remains in my heart always.

Dear Grandma, I miss you so much. I think of you all of the time. It's been 5 years since you left me and it still feels like yesterday. At times I pick up the phone to call you, but then I remember. I would love to hold your hand and tell you how much I love you again. See those beautiful blue eyes staring back at me while you tell me, I love you too honey. You were the best Grandma in the world. You were like a Mother to me. You took care of me every day and gave me lot's of love and kisses. You always taught me that I have to be a good person and I have to believe in and love Jesus. You showed me that I need to be compassionate and love and take care of my family. You showed me how to be a wonderful Mom. You gave me everything I needed in order to grow up feeling loved, wanted to the fullest extent. I remember living with you and being so happy. I remember you always making sure I had candy and sweets to eat no matter what. You always thought about me all of the time and just wanted me to be happy. I remember when you packed my lunch how huge they would be and how much more special my lunches were then all the other kids. I remember you always cooking for me. You made the best scrambled eggs and toast. You loved to cook and you did it so well. I don't think I will ever find somebody who will ever cook as good as you did. I loved your stuffed bell pepper, your split pea soup, your breaded egg plant and chicken. I loved your apple pies. You made everything from scratch. You didn't need a recipe at all. You just had that special touch. I remember you always making sure I was fed and cleaned up and that I had everything I needed.

We would sing & dance all the time to The Andrews Sisters You were always there for me when Mom was not and even when she was. I will never forget all of our camping trips we use to take since I was a baby. It was so much fun being up there in the mountains, all of those trips I will remember forever. I will remember our walks together, and our fishing trips. I will remember laughing at the loudness of your snoring every night. What I wouldn't do to hear that once again.

I remember all of my sleep overs and having to sleep next to Grandma in her bed. We use to laugh and I use to do your hair. It was so much fun. I will always remember going to visit you at work and driving with you in your car. All of those fun times we shared together. All of the holidays, your extra money on birthdays and Christmas. Special gifts big and small. I thank you for all of those special times, too many to say or count. You always took care of me, and I thank you for making my childhood so happy and letting me know truly how much I was loved. It meant so much to me.

As I was growing up your love for me never changed in any way. You were always there for me and just wanted to see me happy. You would always tell me (and you were the only one) just how special I really was. You always told me I was so beautiful and I was your little girl. You always told me never to let anybody tell me different. You let me know that I should never be mistreated by anybody and that I should only be loved and feel happy. I know at times I didn't take your advice, but I know you were always wanting the best for me every time. Your Granddaughter was always priority number one.

When my daughter Arianna was born you loved her just as much. You took care of her and gave her the things you gave me when I was her age. I thank you for that. I thank you for loving my daughter just the same as you loved me. I am so happy that she got to know you. She loved you so much and I know that you will continue to be there for her also. I do regret that you never got to meet my wonderful boys. Oh how you would have loved these little guys. They are so special. Jacob carried on our blue eyed trait. He's so sweet and sensitive. Going to be tall and handsome when he grows up. Jayden is a character. He would have made you laugh so hard. He's so sweet and has the prettiest brown eyes with long eyelashes. Just gorgeous. You would have been so proud. Raising them has been a struggle at times, but you instilled in me the traits and values of what a Mother should be. And that makes my job so much more fulfilling and easier.

I miss so much our talks we use to have on the telephone every night. It didn't matter what time it was, I would call you and we would talk about anything and everything. You were so funny sometimes you made me laugh. You were so tough and just had an awesome spirit about you. You were just so strong willed and no matter what came along you fought back. You and me could talk about things that no body else could. You told me I could understand you like no one else and I am glad I could do that for you.

As the years went by I loved you more and more every day as I know you did me. Even if I didn't see you as much at times I know you knew that I still loved you just as much. You would let me know that and I'm so glad that you did. There were so many scary close calls that I came to loosing you. You always pulled through and I just assumed this time that you would too. But I am so very thankful that I had you in my life for as long as I did. I thank God that he gave you to me as my only Grandma. I couldn't have asked for a better pick. Thank you God for that. Thank you for this Grandma.

I love the Romanian I have in me, I love the heart and soul I have. I am part of you and you will always and forever be a part of me. I often try to focus that you are in a better place and no longer hurting. Because God knows you had your share of it in your life. I keep trying to think you have a new body, new legs like you always wanted. You can breathe again and eat again, walk, talk, laugh, dance. I keeping trying to believe that you are with your daughter Annette and with the love of your life Frank. I believe you are with your tata and mama (grandma & grandpa in Romanian) that you loved so much like I love you. You are finally with your sister that you loved so dearly, the woman I got my blue eyes from. I believe you are with all of your loved ones and you are finally at peace like you have always wanted to be.

I hope you still continue to guide me in the right direction and show me those little signs that you are still with me. Even if it is a small one and not so obvious, I believe that you are my guardian angel. I know I have many, but you are my number one angel in the sky. I love you Grandma. Always and Forever.
Dulcea mea bunicuta, te voi iubii intotdeauna. Imi va fi dor de tine si ma voi gandi la tine mereu. La revedere bunica, nu te voi uita niciodata. Cu dragoste, fetita ta.

9 comments:

  1. Such a beautifull tribute to a special lady...

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  2. you have no idea how much i LOVE the music and your style. (thumbs up)

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  3. Sweet post! My grandmother died 22 years ago next week. Wow I cannot believe it has been that long. I understand how you miss her.
    Hugs,Lisa

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  4. Winona, you spoke those words straight from your heart. I can feel the love you had and still have for your beautiful Grandma.
    She has instilled you with some wonderful traits to pass along to your children. I find when you have morals and values, you cannot go wrong.
    Your on a great track thanks to your Grandma.
    Happy Pink Sat.
    Love Claudie
    xoxo

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  5. Oh honey,God indeed blessed both of you with the relationship you had. What wonderful memories you have and what a gift that you will forever have to re-open as you need to. You can surely rest assured that your precious Grandma watches over you and smiles on you always. And she knows your boys too! Hugs friend, Mollye

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  6. Thank you everyone. It means a lot! She was a terrrific lady.

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  7. What a beautiful & heartfelt tribute to your grandma! She must've been such a special lady!
    Thanks for stopping by my blog today! Hope you'll come back!
    I've really enjoyed taking a quick tour of your blog. It's just delightful, & I will be back when I have a little more time.
    God bless!
    Susan

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  8. Wonderful, special Grandma. What an admirable woman! She loved you very much.

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